Scathing Book Reviews of Stuff White People Like, by Christian Lander

I first heard of Stuff White People Like by Christian Lander on, I admit it, NPR.  (So sue me!  At least I’m not a fan of David Searis).  So I guess I’m in part the target and the target market for this kind of book.  I also have a blog and wear shorts when its just barely warm enough to put them on, I admit. 

These and dozens of other entries are covered in the Stuff White People Like Blog, from which this book sprang.  I admit its clever and good marketing too – a certain kind of person revels in irony, and the idea of embracing something which mocks your taste in Starbucks, Chinese food, and etc. is right up that demographic’s alley. 

HOWEVER, its not just “Stuff White People Like”, as I know from sharing this with friends that “go beyond the pale”, lets say.   A more accurate title of the book would be “Stuff that Middle and Upper Class Metropolitan Area People Like”, as I know for a fact that where I grew up, there’s one Starbucks in the entire county.

Anyway, these Scathing Book Reviews of Stuff White People Like think the book lacks color:

This book is the most offensive piece of dribble that I have ever had the misfortune of purchasing.

…and from the “missing the point” department:

This book is in the humor section, but it did not even make me smile, let alone chuckle. Organic food? Farmer’s Markets? Nonprofit organizations? Adopting children from third world countries? Barack Obama? This is supposed to be satire? Seems to me that supporting these things make for a better world. If he had gone after typical Republican or white trash stuff then maybe he could have squeezed out some humor, but that has all been done before.
 
…and a fairly shocking review (I didn’t write it – you’ll either laugh or cry):

The book was written by a white person and it’s the hallmark of elitist whites to say they’re not elitist and distance themselves from being white. Their “above the fray” attitude indicates that they’re better than all other people who engage in whatever attitudes and behaviors they’ve pointed out to us with their super keen senses. I’ve noted this behavior in English and Jewish people.

…and:

Worthy of sitting next to the toilet so it gets peed on, you know, since it’s not flushable.

…and:

There’s some acute perception and witty writing here. It’s sufficient to carry the reader along in a state of amusement until that inevitable point, otherwise recognizable in a too-prolonged diet of NPR listening, when finally the tone becomes insufferabl

…and, you know, the truth hurts:

I’ve got another thing that white people like: Reviewing books on Amazon and trying to come across as savy and intellectual. (Even on the books that don’t require either of those talents.)

Scathing Book Reviews of I Hope They Serve Beer In Hell, by Tucker Max

I Hope They Serve Beer in Hell by Tucker Max is a book I’m not planning to read.  Why?  Well, if you’re familiar with the Tucker Max Blog, you don’t need more of the same on dead trees, and further, I already know enough Assholes, and have acted similiarly on enough occassions, to read about adventures in Assholery. 

It’s interesting that some people are able to make careers from a public persona of being an Asshole.  For all I know, Tucker Max may in his “real” life be a good guy.  But when he’s “working” or at least writing about what supposedly has happened, his job is to be an Asshole.  I know of at least one person who got into the Tucker Max blog a few years back, and his characterization of her was fairly spot on, so I guess at least some of the time he’s telling the truth and not making it up for his blog. 

Being an Asshole at bars and public places is fun enough for awhile, but I hope for his sake he slows down one day and contains his Asshole behavior to his neighbors and in-laws.  The Scathing Book Reviews of I Hope They Serve Beer in Hell seem to wish Tucker Max would stick the book up his – oh you know what I mean:

 

I’m ashamed I even spent money on this junk. The only redeeming quality was that no one I knew saw me reading it on the airplane.

 …and:

Tucker Max is like Van Wilder: completely unentertaining and hasn’t figured out that what’s really cool when you’re 20 becomes really pathetic when you’re 30.

…and:

Anyone that would think this book is cute or funny should probably have a character assessment

…and:

If you’re more than a year out of community college, don’t bother.

…and:

The book is a lot like a drunk person…entertaining for a few minutes, then just annoying.

…and:

A shallow shell of a human being, Tucker will appeal to 15-23 yr olds with low critical thinking ability. If you like to read books, be sure you will not like this one.

…and:

Anyone buying this book knowing what it is about is a lunatic.

…and while this may be good advice, I don’t think anyone thinking of buying the book would make use of it:

If you want funny, Rabelaisian humour, try Jim Goad instead.

Scathing Book Reviews of Me Talk Pretty One Day, by David Sedaris

Me Talk Pretty One Day by David Sedaris is a book that I never plan to read. Why? Well, I find his NPR stuff a bit too smug, which I know is like complaining about finding books in a bookstore. I was not surprised, although a bit dismayed, to find David Sedaris #25 on the list of What White People Like. (It’s a joke, folks). What do Amazonians think of Sedaris? These reviewers find “Me Talk Pretty” a bit ugly:

Reading is my passion. This was like the worst lover ever.

…and:

I didn’t need to find a private place to read it since I didn’t laugh out loud once… To compare this to the writings of Mark Twain is to gravely insult Mr. Twain.

…and:

There is nothing humorous about this book. I find it rather distrubing and disgusting. Sick might be a better discription.

…and:

He reminds me of a cynical, sarcastic Woody Allen. Using humor to basically say “See how smart I am? I’m making fun of YOU, the AVERAGE person, and you don’t even know it!” Bitterness is not funny – it’s just plain ugly.

…and:

If this is what my friends call a good book, it’s obvious I’ve got to get new friends.

…and:

You may like Sedaris only if you watch network television sitcoms religiously.

…and this, from the Department of Memorable Similies:

It’s like eating chewing gum off the sidewalk — something novel, but not something you want to have inside your body. I’m embarassed that I gave it as a gift and I am writing an apology letter;